comments

Saturday, January 8, 2011
********************************************
FROM MY NOTEBOOKS
****************************************************
The shortest book in the world:
HUMAN RIGHTS IN ARMENIAN HISTORY.
*
Pragmatism always asks: What is the practical or cash value of an idea?
If nothing or negative, it may be safely ignored. Hence the official American reluctance to use the G word. The “cash” value of Armenian friendship is less than the value of Turkish loyalty in the Middle East.
*
Armenian academics are quintessential pragmatists. They would never write a single line against God and capital – make it, Capital and god; and when I say god, I mean of course the god of imams and bishops.
*
What if the first thing we say after we die is neither “I was right,” or “I was wrong,” but nothing?
*
We have nothing to fear from God, but everything to fear from men who speak in His name.
*
For a thousand years we were not allowed to shape our destiny. We know now that our so-called declaration of independence changed nothing.
*
Because for more than a thousand years we have been abused by alien tyrannies, we assume abuse and tyranny to be an integral part of the human condition, very much like death and taxes.
*
Whoever said “friends are God's apology for relatives,” knew what he was saying. Whenever I think of my relatives, I look forward to Alzheimer's.
#
Monday, January 10, 2011
********************************************
THINGS THEY DON'T TEACH IN SCHOOLS
****************************************************
Real education begins
after you drop out or graduate.
*
God is an absentee landlord.
We remind ourselves of this fact whenever we say
“Our Father, Who art in heaven.”
*
You may not be Samson
and she may not be Delilah
but the only thing
you will get from her for nothing
is a haircut.
*
Gandhi on the British in India:
“A satanic force.”
Churchill on Gandhi:
“A malignant subversive fanatic,”
“a thoroughly evil force,”
and “the most successful humbug.”
*
Even our betters don't always know better,
and sometimes what they pretend to know
may well be worse than ignorance.
#
Tuesday, January 11, 2011
********************************************
FROM MY NOTEBOOKS
****************************************************
A headline in my morning paper reads:
“Oldest known winery unearthed in Armenia.”
We now have anoither thing to brag about:
we are the offspring of winos.
*
I was brought up to respect my elders and I did,
until I became an elder myself.
*
To speak of God amounts to translating an incomprehensible text
into a non-existent language.
*
To judge a religion by its scriptures
or an ideology by its political platform
is as absurd as judging a man by his intentions
as opposed to his actions.
Religions and ideologies should be judged by their history.
*
Every time a man speaks the truth
he makes a thousand enemies;
that’s because for every bitter truth
there are a thousand sweet lies
and as many dupes who hate to give up their illusions.
#
Wednesday, January 12, 2011
********************************************
I MAY HAVE SAID THIS BEFORE...
****************************************************
...But it bears repeating.
*
A revolution in which the revolutionaries survive
but the people perish by the million.
*
A status quo in which the offspring
of the very same revolutionaries
now say to the offspring of the victims:
“We promise to get even with the Turks
provided we have your financial support.”
*
“In politics,” it has been said,
“lies are called promises.”
*
In the Homeland, rule by mafia.
In the Diaspora, rule by fund-raisers.
*
A nation of sheep
deserves wolves as leaders.
*
Our collective IQ is negative.
#