prologue

Sunday, September 27, 2009
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IF THE PAST IS PROLOGUE
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The only thing that so far has changed in our collective existence is the size and nature of our blunders.
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To make plans without taking into consideration the unforeseen, the unknown, and the unknowable is to court disaster.
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The apologists of the Wall Street bonus scandal call it “an insignificant fraction of the bailout money.” That's what they said about Watergate too -- “a third-rate burglary.”
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I once heard an Armenian from the Homeland say, “So what if he [Nixon] lied? They lie to us every day.”
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I look forward to the day when capitalism will bite the dust as communism did.
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They gave the Nobel Prize to Arafat and Kissinger but not to Tolstoy and Gandhi. And when they awarded the Prize to Thomas Mann they did so not for THE MAGIC MOUNTAIN but for BUDDENBROOKS.
Had Hitler won World War II, he too would have been considered for the Nobel Prize “for pacifying the West after thirty centuries of almost ceaseless internecine conflicts.”
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“After Hitler won World War II...” What a novel one could write with such a first line!
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Before you dare to disagree with an Armenian, consider the words of an old wise man: “When you fight with a pig, you both get dirty, but only the pig likes it.”
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Monday, September 28, 2009
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IN PRAISE OF BREVITY
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Better a bad haiku than a mediocre sonnet.
In writing the principle that never fails is brevity. Keep it short!
A paragraph may be admirable in its beauty and complexity,
but it is one-liners that stick to one's mind.
“To be or not to be...”
“Workers of the world unite, you have nothing to lose but your chains.”
“A bourgeois is a bourgeois regardless of nationality.”
“An Armenian's tongue is sharper than a Turk's yataghan.”
“Once upon a time we were willing to die for freedom, we are now afraid of free speech.”
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ONE-LINERS FROM DIOGENES
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To the son of a prostitute who threw a stone at him:
“Be careful, my boy, you may be hitting your father.”
To a bald man who insulted him:
“I congratulate the hairs on your head for abandoning a fool like you.”
On being reprimanded for masturbating in public:
“I wish I could satisfy my hunger as easily.”
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ON NATIONALISM
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In the Middle Ages Armenians ruled empires and they were themselves ruled by Jews (Bagratunis) and the Mamigonians (Chinese). What has nationalism done for us except to divide us further?
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Tuesday, September 29, 2009
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OBITER DICTA
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In the eyes of God, some wars are just.
Yes, but whose God?
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I have been cheated by the poor and I have been cheated by the rich. The difference is that when I was cheated by the rich, they made it look like they were doing me a favor.
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What others think of us may be as removed from reality as what we think of ourselves.
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I look forward to the day when I will no longer look forward to anything.
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Jesus and Torquemada, Marx and Stalin, God and the Devil: Can they be really separated?
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There is a type of contradiction that is a symptom not of inconsistency but of ferment.
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No one lives long enough to enjoy his immortality.
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Our body language is invisible to us.
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Wednesday, September 30, 2009
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SCHOOLS OF PHILOSOPHY
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Speaking of the superficiality of the Byzantine Empire, Zarian remarks somewhere: “Not a single school of philosophy.” By contrast, America may be said to be bursting at the seams with schools of philosophy.
The first time I heard someone say, “Live and let live, that's my philosophy,” I thought he was being funny. It took me a while to realize that he was dead serious. If a cliché can be a philosophy, any moron can parade as a philosopher. Which reminds me of the fact that after the Americans liberated Greece and GIs were seen everywhere in Athens, a new phrase entered the Greek language: “Do you take me for an American?” Meaning, “Do you take me for a moron?”
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It must be just about the oldest trick in the world. You want to fool someone? Convince him he is so smart than no one can fool him.
You want to convince an entire race of men to behave like unspeakable barbarians? Convince them into believing they belong to a superior race.
That's why “Life is a bitch,” “Sh*t happens,” and “There ain't no such thing as a free lunch.” That is always why “There are more sorrows on earth than there are stars in heaven.” (Apik Avakian)
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Closer to home: Do you need a class of men to behave like neo-Stalinist crypto-commissars? Brainwash a bunch of bullies into thinking they have leadership qualities. That is also why our political leaders are no better than the scum of the earth.
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