glory

Sunday, July 12, 2009
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THE POWER AND THE GLORY
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One way to explain our status as perennial underdogs is to say that our ruling classes have spent more time, energy, and resources fighting among themselves and collaborating with our oppressors than serving the interests of the people. The reason why I think as i do is that I have an instinctive loathing of all power -- be it the power of emperors, kings, sultans, popes, ayatollahs, bosses, commissars, and revolutionaries, especially failed revolutionaries who end up doing more harm than good, after which they waste the rest of their allotted time on earth rewriting history, brainwashing the people, and portraying themselves as heroes and our victims as martyrs. And what is even more outrageous, they are believed by some. And whenever a dissenter comes along – and our literature has been one of dissent – and explains things to us honestly and objectively, we either silence him or ignore him, sometimes we even betray him to the authorities, the very same authorities that have dehumanized us.
“Mart bidi ch'ellank / esh bidi menank.”
*
If I knew how to pray, I would go down on my knees and say:
“O Lord, I implore you from the depths of my heart,
help me to see that so far
everything I have said, written, and thought
has been wrong, and that our leaders
have been men of vision and humble servants of the people,
and all our dissidents have been
no better than the scum of the earth.
For thine is the power and the glory.
Amen.”
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Monday, July 13, 2009
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A SIMPLE APOLOGY
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Allow me to introduce myself: “A.B., Armenian scribbler.” Which in our environment stands for less than nobody. And worse. In the words of one of our national benefactors, speaking to an elderly writer and teacher who had dared to contradict him: “I hire and fire people like you every day.” And yet, every statement I make is carefully analyzed by some readers as if a single wrong word in the wrong place would mean the total collapse of their inner world and the disintegration of the Homeland.
And what is it exactly that I have been saying? Simply this: I don't believe everything I am told by our sermonizers, speechifiers, and fund-raisers who operate on the assumption that the more they flatter us the more generous will our contribution be to their cause.
If I have been wrong, what has been my greatest mistake? Only this: to think that if my aim is to understand what's happening to us, I prefer to learn from our writers, most of whom worked for minimum wage or even nothing, unlike our bosses, bishops, and benefactors, who as far as I know have at no time been dependent on the charity of swine.
And now, may I share with you some of the things that I have learned:
From Movses Khorenatsi I have learned that our decline as a nation began in the 5th century A.D. (see his LAMENTATION).
From Yeghishé I have learned that in a divided nation, both the dividers and their dupes are destined to bite the dust.
From Naregatsi I have learned that it is a waste of time blaming others for our misfortunes and blunders. We should instead examine our conscience.
From Baronian and Odian I have learned that our religious and political leaders are not our “betters” but our worst.
From Zohrab I have learned that a free press is a key ingredient in every healthy community.
From Zarian I have learned that cannibalism and Christianity are mutually exclusive concepts.
To those who say my selection of writers is biased and reflects my preconceptions and prejudices, and that there are many others who have been more positive in their assessment of our past; I say, yes, I agree. From Hagop Oshagan I have learned that a writer with a family to support will say anything to please those on whose goodwill he depends for his survival. And the sad truth is, such writers have always outnumbered the dissidents.
If I am a pessimist, it may be because so is our literature, but not to worry: for everyone who thinks as I do, there are hundreds perhaps even thousands who produce the kind of verbiage whose sole intent is to flatter our bruised egos and to convince us into believing we are in good hands and we never had it so good.
“Mi kich pogh oughargetsek.”
*
When asked by a friend to respond to some of his critics, Orson Welles is quoted as having said: “Cannot imagine what you expect me to write...beyond simple apology for having been born.”
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Tuesday, July 14, 2009
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PROJECTIONS & CONJECTURES
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Armenians bore the hell out of me –
their stiff-necked dogmatism,
their addiction to brag,
their pathological preference for comfortable lies
and their phobia of painful truths;
their endless internecine conflicts,
their deep insecurities which find expression
in loud-mouth (borodakhos) arrogance...
Relax! I am not talking about you, gentle reader.
I am talking about myself when young.
I have no doubt whatever in my mind that,
unlike me, you are a noble specimen of humanity
and butter wouldn't melt in your mouth,
or anywhere else for that matter.
*
A nation that has been lied to consistently
will be inclined to believe only liars.
*
You cannot speak in praise of capitalism
in a communist country and vice versa.
It is a risky business
discussing democracy with fascists;
and nothing can be as hard
as trying to reason with dupes of propaganda.
What could be more subversive
than a lecture on atheism in a cathedral,
or a speech on human rights in an Armenian community center?
*
I don't study history in order to enhance my self-esteem.
I study history to understand my fellow men and myself.
Anyone who studies history for any other purpose
is doomed to understand nothing.
*
Armenianism is an “ism” like any other ism.
It should be carefully analyzed and not adopted as a belief system.
*
More blood has been shed in the name of patriotism
than any other ideology or religion.
If patriotism means loyalty to one's nation
and disloyalty to the rest of mankind,
I want no part of it.
“My country, right or wrong!”
should also stand for “My country, rich or poor,”
and “My country, in peace or war.”
A true patriot living in self-imposed exile is an oxymoron
(with emphasis on the last two syllables);
and a warlike patriot who is unwilling to kill and die
speaks with a forked tongue.
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Wednesday, July 15, 2009
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OF CABBAGES & KINGS
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As an underdog, I identify myself with underdogs of all nations and I loathe all murderers and rapists even when they call themselves Alexander the Great and Suleiman the Magnificent. How “Great” was our own Dikran to his victims?
*
Once upon a time I had an insatiable curiosity about Armenians. I read and reviewed books – sometimes as many as three at a time – in which Armenians were mentioned. Not any more. I have had enough of their subservience to authority, that is to say, to bearded cassocks, empty suits, and fat-bellied slobs.
*
It is not “white man who speaks with a forked tongue,” but power. For centuries the average dupe believed kings ruled in the name of God. And when the Czars (Russian for Caesars) were replaced by commissars, things got from bad to worse.
*
The historic evidence seems to suggest that when men rule, it is more likely that they do so in the name of the Devil.
*
How do you convince the average Armenian who has been brought up to believe he is smarter than the smartest “hria” that his political IQ hovers somewhere between +1 and 0?
*
Orson Welles: “Magic is directed almost entirely to men. Women hate it – it irritates them. They don't like to be fooled. And men do.”
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